Murphy’s Law – Bar Edition

  • When people fight over paying the check… The poor tipper always wins.

  • Someone says, “I’ll tip you the next round”… They never order again.

  • You notice a keg is low… Everyone wants that beer.

  • In the middle of the rush, once one liquor bottle empties… Every single one you grab after will follow.

  • When a rarely ordered item is low on stock… everyone will order it immediately.

  • Your manager tells you that you can do an early last call… Five minutes before you do, a group of 25 walks in.

  • No one has ordered draft for an hour, you clean off all the taps… five minutes before close, 5 people want 7 different draft beers.

  • Take a quick bathroom break when your bar is empty… 90 seconds later you get back to a full bar and a line of service tickets.

  • Ran out of limes… A run on Corona orders.

  • Credit card machines never break… Until you’re slammed.

  • Your friend is one of the hardest-working people you know… Until you get them a job.

  • You never break a glass in the well… Unless it’s the busiest rush of the busiest shift of the year.

  • You have cuts on your hand… Everyone wants a twist.

  • You say, “Wow ‘Douche’ hasn’t been in here in months, it’s been great!”… They will walk in 20 minutes later.

  • Overstaff for a big event… Dead.

  • Multiple staff members call out on a traditionally slow night… Slammed.

  • The one co-worker who somehow still has a job, but shouldn’t… Will decide you’re the only co-worker they want to work with.

  • If a keg blows, and you’re slow, no problem… If a keg blows and you’re busy, 5 more will follow.

  • Someone asks you to recite your entire 45 bottled beer selections… orders a generic light beer.

  • If you come in with a hangover… The only thing ordered will be the same liquor that caused the hangover.

  • Every table is clean but the one you are about to get to… The next group “has” to sit there.

  • It never rains for any of your shifts… Unless you’re working your deck/patio/outside bar shift.

  • Slammed all night, full bar and service printer going at full-steam, finally a seat opens up by your station… It is quickly swiped up by someone that continuously seeks your attention so he or she can continue their soliloquy.

Page 1 • 2